9 days till thanksgiving

When I was a kid, and when my kids were kids, Thanksgiving was pretty straightforward.  We didn't always go the same place for Thanksgiving, but there was not craziness about trying to go to everyone's Thanksgiving, no one arguing about whose turn it was; none of that.

These days, its like a tug-a-war with every person thinking it has to be their year to host so they can also invite their inlaws and not have to worry about going to 2 meals or, in the world of divorce, the inlaws two meals and the family's 2 meals and so on and so on.

No one will say, this year its at my house.
No one will say, sorry, we were at your house last year.
No one will say, I think we want a small, intimate meal with just immediate family.

People out of town invite themselves for the week.
People that invited you to thanksgiving a week ago decide they are bringing the people they invited to their house to your house instead.
People that don't see each other except at holidays, and never talk except on facebook--unless they have unfollowed each other, suddenly are very sure that they all have to see each other over turkey.

And the menu.
It must be traditional.
It must offer a full selection for those that don't like traditional.
It must be low calorie.
There must be enough that everyone can gorge themselves.
No one can miss anything they associate with their own definition of thanksgiving food.

BUT
No one has a table that will seat more than 8 people comfortably. with a four person breakfast nook table in another room.
No one can take the week off to cook and clean so the meal is actually all done at the same time.
No one can tell you what all is going to arrive at the meal.
No one has plates for everyone or silverware for everyone or glasses for everyone---

except the oldest of us.

And millennials are all about passing the torch ASAP.

So, all the traditional food will be cooked using pinterest recipes that no one has tried.
All the food will be served on paper plates and eaten with plastic ware.
All the drinks will come in their own cans or bottles.

People will be sitting on the couch and leaning against countertops and sitting on the front porch trying to eat while too uncomfortable to try to visit with the people nearest them, should they know those people, should they like those people, should they not be a person that they normally avoid at all costs the rest of the year.

If the neighbors wouldn't show up with a paper plate full of their own terrible thanksgiving food, I'd stay home and cook myself a feast.

This year, I'm thankful thanksgiving only comes once a year.